Sunday, December 20, 2009

Remembering Together

I've been remembering my babies a lot this Holiday Season. Grieving their loss. Trying to imagine how crazy our household would be with seven children {six of them the same age}. It makes me smile. It makes me sad.

For those who have lost a loved one, the Holidays are a tightly woven tapestry of joy, pain, celebration and grief. One part can't be separated from another. Many are remembering what was and others, like me, are picturing what could have been. Memories that were yet to be made.

As time passes between death and the present, grieving gets lonelier. Life continues. The world keeps revolving. But for the one who has experienced loss, though the grief may ebb and flow, they always remember.

And oh, the beauty of remembering with others. Letting them know, that you haven't forgotten. That the life of their loved one mattered.

I know this season is busy, but do you know someone who could use encouragement? Maybe a card or a quick phone call.

Perhaps you are the one who needs to be lifted up. If so, please feel free to leave the name of the person{s} you are remembering this season. I would be honored to remember them with you and to pray that as you grieve, your grief would not be without hope.

Love you all.

video

30 comments:

  1. This Christmas I remember my dad who died before any of my children were born. I'm sad that he never got to know them or spoil them.

    I also mourn for my brother in law who died in August '08. We spent last weekend with his wife and two kids. His 5 year old looks just like him, and I'm sad he will never really know his dad. We will spend a lot of time reminding him of how much his dad loved him and what an incredible man of God his dad was.

    Thanks for the video. I'm praying for you this Christmas. I found Noemi's blog when your sextuplets were born. I followed and prayed for you as you were all in the hospital. I haven't forgotten your precious children.

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  2. My Aunt Rose has been gone for a year and a half but Christmas was her favorite time of year so its a bittersweet time of year for our family too. I will include yours in my prayers for her.

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  3. Your video has brought goosebumps to my body. Thank you for letting us into your world and sharing with us. I hope this season brings you a little bit more healing and understanding.

    I am remembering my Grandfather, who also my daughter will never remember.

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  4. Wow... what a beautiful, beautiful tribute. All the thoughts I have about what you have and are going through. The truth is, none of them are fit to say. My silence is their perfect tribute. Those babies were so wonderful.
    I followed your story daily throughout your journey. I prayed for you. I prayed for them. I waited and hoped that you could bring home each and every one. I cried at every Homegoing. And I know that you cannot wait to be Home with them where you will never have to be apart again. God bless your family and your future.

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  5. I am remembering my father, my grandparents, and a few others. I am thinking about the fact that I would be 32 weeks or 14 weeks- I lost a pregnancy in July and one a month ago. That is getting easier, and we are celebrating the fact that my sister in law is 12 weeks pregnant. Celebrating new life, if not our own.

    I will also think about your little ones this season. I can't imagine the pain and frustration that comes with your situation. But your two little ones are wonderful.

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  6. Thank you Brianna for sharing. I always appreciate your honesty, knowing God is using you! I remember the baby I would be due with in 2 weeks, had I not miscarried this summer. I celebrate the new life I am carrying, coming next summer. I also think of a family I know who lost their only child in an accident this summer (you can read their story at http://mourningformicah.blogspot.com), and my friends who lost their twin babies at 20 weeks, but would have been born last Christmas had they made it full term. I can't help but think of all our babies who have gone "too soon" for us, but I know God has a purpose in all this and He is our Great Comforter in moments when we just grieve and cry. Blessings to you.

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  7. 11:17, my thoughts exactly. I can't even see thru my tears. Thank you so very much for sharing this. You are not alone in wishing things had been different. I PRAISE GOD that He spared Sylas. What great things we look forward to in his life.
    Blessings, you sweet sweet family.
    Amanda in Ohio

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  8. Remembering my great grandmother who was such an amazing woman. In January it will be 2 years since she passed. Christmas was the time of year that we always seen her and celebrated the life of Jesus. Now she celebrates right along side of him. I love you Grandma and I miss you each and every day. Know that the lives of your beautiful babies have enriched and changed so many lives. Praying for you. God Bless.

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  9. Today I am remembering my precious little 11 week old baby that was growing inside of me. I began to miscarry yesterday and continue the process of losing my little baby today.
    Though I will never hold this baby this side of heaven, I cannot wait until the day in heaven when I will meet that child face to face and finally wrap my arms around him or her and say face to face, "I love you." I will never forget you, little one.

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  10. My sister in law Jaimie Lyn who passed away at the age of 19 after an 8 year battle with cancer.

    I also remember my grandparents.

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  11. Brianna, this is so beautiful. Your sweet babies are not forgotten. I grieve with you that you cannot watch them grow on this earth, but I rejoice with you for the time to come!

    Lots of love...

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  12. praying for you...and remembering my mom, who passed away 5 years ago. I am sad she never got to know my husband or her grandchild. I am due with my second baby in two weeks and it gives me comfort to think perhaps she did meet this little one, that maybe she picked him out for me.

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  13. what a beautiful video of your precious children. you are an amazing couple and i continue to pray for you. may God give you His incredible peace this holiday season as we celebrate His birth. your children are with Him in Heaven and await your arrival. may God continue to pour out His grace and mercy on you until then.
    love a sister in Him

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  14. I don't often comment on blogs, but after watching the video, I couldn't NOT comment. Thank-you for sharing your beautiful babies with us. All 7 of your children are so blessed to have you as their mother. May you be blessed with peace and comfort this Christmas.

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  15. Brianna, thank you again for a post that speaks to my heart. You have a beautiful way with words!!! I think of your babies so often, even though we have never met. Your story - their lives - have touched me beyond what I can even tell you.

    I am remembering them this holiday season and always.

    I, too, am remembering my angels in a different way this year. I'm not sure if it's because it is quickly approaching the 6 year mark of their birth and death, if it is because I've connected with other angel moms like yourself more lately, if it's because I know I'm done having children so something in me has changed, if it's because this year I've watched two other friends have to say goodbye to their children way too soon...whatever it is my heart is remembering in a different way.

    Those I am remembering this season include:

    My son and daughter, Devin and Elizabeth, born and went to heaven on 1/15/04.

    My friend's daughters, Carynne and Sydney, who left this earth in February of this year, a day apart, at only 5 months old.

    My friend's daughter, Elsie, who passed away in the womb around 20 weeks, but was able to allow her mother to carry her twin brother, Jacob until 12/14/09 so he can survive.

    My friend's daughter, Katie, who passed away at the age of 24 after a long battle with cancer in 2007.

    Thank you for this opportunity. Praying for all of you...

    Hugs,
    Julie

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  16. We have a freinds that lost ther 16yr old daughter a few weeks ago in a car accident. It will be a very hard christams this year.

    Have a great Christmas and New Year.

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  17. I will be remembering my first child, who was miscarried at the end of September. Although I find comfort in knowing our sweet babe is watching over us, it's not the same as feeling him grow inside me. I definitely find myself picturing what could have been this Christmas. The grieving for our baby is different than the sadness I've felt for other loved ones who have passed -- and I feel your words that grieving gets lonelier as time passes between death and the present are so true.

    I'll also be remembering my husband's grandma who passed away this summer and our other grandparents who passed away years ago.

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  18. That video is so beautiful. I cried the whole time. Thank you for sharing it with me. They are so beautiful!!

    Christmas is always a time of sadness for me and my family. Like you, my heart hurts for the one we lost. Gracie Ann went to be with Jesus in October 2006 due to a genetic disorder, Trisomy 13, that took her little life. I wonder every year what it would be like to have another little one running around.

    My brother passed away, while in the Navy in Okinawa, Japan in August 1996 when he was only 21years old, I was 10. He was my mom's "miracle baby" as she had lost a son before him and another after him and then went on to have 4 girls.

    My grandfather passes away May 2008 after a long battle with cancer. We made the 13hour trip down to see him when Joshua was only 6weeks old. All my grandfather could say, as he looked at Joshua, was "I love him". He repeated it over and over and that was the only thing we heard him say the entire time we were with him. He went to be with Jesus a few weeks later. It makes me so sad that my children will never know their great-grandfather. I was his girl.

    Brianna, you are always on my mind and on my heart and I will be praying for you more during this Christmas season.

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  19. This is our first Christmas since we lost our son on May 16, 2009 (to miscarriage) and our daughter on November 19, 2009 (to an ectopic pregnancy). I am unsure of how to handle myself, but I keep moving forward the best I can.

    I would appreciate your prayers during this difficult holiday season, as we try to figure out how to navigate this path paved with pain and uncertainty.

    I will be praying for you and your sweet family as well, that your hearts will be filled with the peace of Christ.

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  20. Thanks for sharing this beautiful look at your babes. I always love the look you have on your face when you're rocking at the end.

    I thought I was doing fine this season and then driving home from the grocery store today burst out crying. I miss my mom and dad.

    Thanks for putting words to grief.

    Love you much,

    Vicki

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  21. I will pray for your peace and comfort.

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  22. Thank you for sharing the video, and your bittersweet feelings about this holiday season.

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  23. Oh Brianna, you have courage and wisdom beyond your years. I pray for you often as you go through the many stages of grief ~ I'm so thankful that you allow the Father to gently guide you. Please remember my close friend Beth as she mourns 5 miscarriages within the past two years. Tomorrow she meets with a fertility specialist who will do a procedure to try to answer the many questions... Pray that she is able to endure the questions and off handed remarks that she will endure at her family gatherings, as well as seeing lots of friends that have new babies. Enjoy the time with your family this Christmas season:)

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  24. oh those precious babies. i am going to be praying for you. (really!) this season of joy can be so filled with mixed emotions when you are grieving. peace and many blessings to you, bri. thank you for sharing that video.

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  25. Brianna,

    What a privilege that you would share your very precious babies with us here. Words escape me at this moment for what I just experienced watching your incredible video. My heart is overwhelmed. Beautiful, absolutely beautiful!

    Praying for you as I continue to "watch" your life by way of your lovely blog. So enjoy how you write and the openness of your heart! Thank you!

    Lovingly,

    Cathy
    www.fullhousemama.blogspot.com

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  26. Thank you for including us this holiday season as we all deal with our grief. Your video was very hard for me to watch as my daughter spent 3 weeks in the NICU and went to be with Jesus on 27 October, 2009. She died of a horrible disease, spinal muscular atrophy, and I thank you for letting me remember her here and be able to say a prayer for all of us grieving this holiday season. God Bless

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  27. Brianna, Thank you for sharing those lovely words and that beautiful video. I have been having similar thoughts to yours -- in May 2007 I gave birth to, and lost, three amazing baby boys just shy of 20 weeks gestation after four previous pregnancy losses. (I actually delivered them in the hospital room next to yours when you were there on bed rest -- small world.) Though we now have a nearly one-year-old boy, I am fluctuating between joy and sorrow depending on the moment. Know that I am thinking about you. Take care.

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  28. Thank you for sharing your story with us. I started following your story when yur were pregnant with your babies. Mainly, because you were from Minnesota where most of my family lives and I loved the thought of all those sweet babies. I have prayed for you guys and cried for you as well. This season I remember my sweet son, Samuel who was stillborn at 22 weeks in 2004. Thank you for sharing your life and heart. God bless....

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  29. I just found your blog through the CupCake 10 blog...I followed your family's story closely when your sextuplets were born (I am also from MN)

    I have 4 kids (12, 10, 8 & 21 months) My youngest was a twin and we lost her twin at 20 weeks. It was one of the hardest things i have ever dealt with. I always thought I would be immune to the pain of loss especially in a miscarriage...I always told myself earlier in life that I could deal with that kind of loss...I almost prepared myself for being strong so no one would see me crumble. I was so wrong...the minute we were told by the US technician that Baby B had no heart beat I crumbled.

    We find we cling to Jessica (the one who survived) more than ever. She has brough so much joy as have all our children! Our faith reminds us we are not forgotten and our baby in heaven is not forgotten.


    I look forward to reading your blog!

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  30. Delurking to say it was a pleasure to meet you and that you are a beautiful writer.

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Thank you so much for taking the time to share. I love hearing from you.

P.S. I'm sorry for the word verification step, but oh, my. I'm getting lots of spam.