Thursday, May 28, 2009

Away We Go

This girl...

...slept in her own room the past two nights. Ok, maybe it's not a room, but a large closet about three feet away from our bed. It still feels like she's too far away, but if I get over myself, I know that this is better. She's starting to wake up easily with noise and light, and since our bedroom is more like a large room with our bed, couch, rocking chair, tv and desk in it, little Ives needs some peace and quiet.

Since I have a hard time with Ivy sleeping on the other side of a door three feet away, there is no chance I would leave her for two nights while Ryan and I head to Door County. Yes, that's right, we're going on a vacation!!! Dawn, a wonderful reader of my blog has gifted us with a stay at their family's condo in Door County. Amazing, right? Even more amazing, is that I don't even her! She emailed me a couple of months ago, and told me that she and her mom decided that Ryan and I need a vacation. What an astute decision, Dawn. We do need a vacation. So, while Sy man is living it up with Nonna and Papa, Ryan and I, with Ivy in tow, will be heading out this evening, hoping to enjoy long walks along the beach, swimming in the resorts indoor pool and eating way too much food. Dawn, thank you for blessing us with this opportunity. We love you!

Tuesday, May 26, 2009

Sweet Pearly

She needs me.

She lets others hold her for 10 minutes here and 20 minutes there, but then it's back to mommy.

I'm ok with that.

Thursday, May 21, 2009

Four Years

Four years of life and loss.

Four years of laughter and lament.

Four years of love. Always love.

Happy anniversary, my darling. I love you.

Monday, May 18, 2009

New Wheels

This morning, Sy's Physical Therapist brought out a walker for him to test drive. I admit I was a little skeptical. Sylas doesn't really like trying to walk holding on to our hands and he really doesn't like walking behind push toys. He's also very interested in the mechanics of things and I was sure that the wheels of the walker would be more fascinating than actually walking.

I was wrong.

Our little Bug was intrigued from the moment he laid eyes on his new wheels. Before he even knew what the walker was, he started calling it a "tractor." Since moving to Wisconsin, Sylas has a new found love of tractors, so of course he wanted to try out his new tractor. In no time, he was cruising around the wood floors like he's been doing it his whole life.

As hard as I try, I don't think I can put into words the joy that has filled my heart today. To see my son, who once weighed a mere 15 ounces, walk, is breathtaking.

I am in awe of what God has done.

Sunday, May 17, 2009


I am so encouraged by all the amazing comments you left! Wow! It sounds as though I'm not alone in trying to gracefully wear the many hats of motherhood. I've felt more at rest the last couple of days. Soon I'll share some of what God's doing in my heart, but for now, let's get down to business. Congratulations Mom2Valerie! chose YOU!!! Shoot me an email with your address, and I'll send you some luxurious Aveda Hand Relief.

Sylas has a busy week ahead. His new Physical Therapist is bringing out a walker for him to try and he's possibly getting fitted for orthotics on Wednesday. So exciting. As his therapist said, "We need to get this boy walking." Yes. Yes, we do.

Ok, my kids are asleep, so off to bed for me. Did I ever tell you that I love sleeping? Love it. So much.

Wednesday, May 13, 2009


I know I've been suspiciously absent from the blog world. I've purposely not written for fear of the ugliness that might end up on the screen. I started this blog as a place where I could be honest and vulnerable, and while I have been vulnerable with you, it's been a well thought out vulnerability. A proof read, spell checked vulnerability. A neat and tidy vulnerability. At the moment, my thoughts feel so chaotic, that if I were to attempt to tell you how I'm feeling, you kind and lovely readers may feel emotionally vomited upon. I'm trying to sort out what it means to be a wife, a pastor's wife, a daughter, a mother, a medical treatment coordinator, a milk maker, a friend, a blogger, a half marathon runner and most importantly a child of God, all at the same time.


While you're all waiting for me to sort myself out, I thought I'd have a little giveaway. Leave a comment, any old comment, on this post by midnight Friday, and you could win a purse sized Aveda Hand Relief. We all could use a little relief now and then, don't you think? I'll choose the winner via, and let you know who was chosen on Saturday.


Thursday, May 7, 2009

Medical Mumbo Jumbo

Sylas got new glasses! I unfortunately don't have a picture, but honestly I don't think many people are even going to notice a difference. The frames are the same color, only a little bigger. The biggest change is the prescription. When we went to the Opthamologist last month, we learned that not only had Sy's left eye gotten much worse, but he's now also nearsighted in his right eye. His old glasses were barely helping him!

I wish you all could have seen Bug's face when he tried on his new glasses. He slowly turned his head from side to side, then started pointing at everything, trying to tell me what he could see. It was so beautiful. I started crying right there in the optical.

Sylas has always been really good about wearing his glasses, and now he seems to enjoy them even more. Yesterday when I walked into his room to get him up from his nap, instead of asking for his pacifier (which he constantly tosses out of his crib) or a bottle, he asked for his glasses. They are helping him see and it makes me so happy.

We also had our first meeting with our new Physical and Occupational Therapists. They both seem wonderful and Ryan and I are hopeful that soon our boy will be walking. Walking on his own is still a ways off, but we're going to be looking into different treatments and adaptive equipment in the very near future.

By the way, for those of you who don't follow me on Twitter, Sy's EEG came back normal. HOORAY!

Let's see, what else? Last week, Sy had a visit with our new Pulmonologist (lung doc) and she said that the x-ray of his lungs looked phenomenal for a baby born as premature as our little guy. We know. He's amazing.