Friday, September 19, 2008

The Neurology Appointment

I'm an emotional wreck. Sylas had his neurology appointment this morning and the neurologist said that Sylas does fall into the category of having cerebral palsy. Not new news, but solidified news that was like a punch in the gut. He also said that Sylas' arms are tighter than he would like to see, and only time will tell whether it's spastic diplegia or quadriplegia. Ok, this was new news. It's not something we'd even talked about with any of our doctors or therapists. No one even mentioned there being a problem in his arms. On occasion, I have observed that Sylas' arms are stiff and he resists having them raised above his head, but he always seemed to have good range of motion, so I didn't make a big deal of it. Maybe I was in denial. Then to top it all off, we stopped at Walmart on the way home to return something and they wouldn't let me return it because my receipt was 5 days past 90 days. I understand policies and I myself am an avid rule follower, but I wanted to cry and scream that I just found out that my son might be a quadriplegic, so let me return the stupid toy! I refrained, got the items I needed, then calmly proceeded to my car where I balled my eyes out. Sylas cried too. He hates to sit in a non-moving vehicle. Eventually we made it home and had some lunch and then we were happier. Oh, the power of food. My afternoon has gone much better after a lovely visit with a friend and a new sweater from GAP. I'm now sitting at home watching my beautiful, happy, energetic son sleeping peacefully, and I'm reminded that God is good and that this news doesn't change how precious Sylas is and how blessed I am to be given such a gift.

19 comments:

  1. I'm sorry to hear Sylas's situation is a bit more complicated than you thought...

    But I'm GLAD the doctor was able to let you know of the situation, so you can do whatever needs to be done to try to help sooner rather than later.

    Hugs to you both...

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  2. Brianna, You are such a good mommy. I know you know Sylas is a gift, but it's okay to be a little sad sometimes. God has worked so many miracles in Sylas' life...he's not done yet. I will be praying. Sending love and good wishes your way, Amber

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  3. I am so sorry you had such a rough day. You are in my thoughts and prayers. I am crying as I write this.....such hard news to hear. I don't know how you feel, but I do know that God knows....He loves you all so much. Remember that Sylas is His!!! God has an awesome plan for Sylas' life. My nephew is a quad from a car accident at 2 yrs old. It was so hard, and truthfully still is, but God shows our family daily of how he is using this little boy for such special things. I will be praying for God's encouragement and for the Holy Spirit's comfort for you and your family. Sylas is so special and is so blessed to have you as his mommy!!! Love from a sister in Christ.

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  4. Brianna, without a doubt you are one of the most inspiring woman I know. You have an inner strength that radiats from you and you probably dont even realise it. We will continue to pray for little Sylas and for the both of you.

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  5. ...praying for you!

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  6. I am sorry to hear you had such a bad day. You are doing a wonderful job as a mom and Sylas looks like a very happy little guy. My thoughts and prayers are with you as you learn more about what needs to help little Sylas.

    Blessings.
    Melissa

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  7. tiedtogetherwithasmileSeptember 20, 2008 at 2:39 PM

    I'm sorry to hear that you are having a tough day. Your strength and courage amaze me and Sylas is blessed to have such wonderful parents. You are so right to say that this does not change Sylas at all, he is still your same amazing son that he was yesterday. I am praying for strength for you all!!

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  8. I agree with everyone else..you are a wonderful mother with so much love. You do have a right to be upset it is a human emotion. Just as everyone said God has a plan for all of us including Sylas, he has been with him this far. Just know that we are all here for you even though we may not all know you. You are in my prayers.

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  9. I'm sorry to hear about the bad news that you got. It sounds like you're already learning to take it one day at a time and realizing some important truths: that no matter what, Sylas is a gift to you and a son who you love so much and God is always faithful. You have some solid unchangeable truths that I hope will help you get through the hard days. We will be praying for God's grace to you.

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  10. I just found out you had a blog from Noemiphotography. I followed your pregnancy, delivery, joy and loss during my pregnancy last year. I am so happy that you are expecting again. My prayers are always with you and your family. I also wanted to let you know that I am a special ed teacher and while I know that it is devastating to hear about CP, I just want to tell you that no matter what as long as Sylas has you and Daddy supporting him, fighting for him, and being his biggest advocates and fans, he will succeed. All the best.

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  11. I just love Sylas and his family SO much! We'll continue praying for you as you move forward in this challenging journey!
    All three of you have been so brave!

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  12. I so sorry to hear the new news. I love you and am praying for you!
    Lots of hugs.

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  13. Bri, I love you !
    And am praying for you, ryan, and little Sy guy.

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  14. Don't let this news get you down. Even if the prognosis isn't what you hoped for - you should know, that nothing is always set in stone. My great grandmother was given 6 months to live and lived 6 years. Things change. I have seen miracles and Sylas is one of them. He looks very much like a happy and energetic baby and that is all that matters. If he does have struggles as he gets older, he does. You want to do what you can to help him along the way, but don't it get you down. You have a great little boy, regardless of any medical conditions he may have.

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  15. Sending up prayers for you and your precious family.

    Lisa in Virginia

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  16. Oh Brianna, I'm so sorry for your hard day and subsequent hard days dealing with what you've heard from the neurologist. I'm sure your mind is going crazy wondering, what if?, what about this? why?, etc...Just keep taking it day by day. When my son was diagnosed with CP, it was devastating but I too realized that it didn't change who he is. Sylas is a gift and a miracle. You and Ryan are amazing parents and Sylas is going to be an awesome big brother! God Bless you all.

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  17. "Do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand." Isaiah 41:10. Be encouraged even during this trying time...He hasn't strengthened and upheld you this long to let you go now!

    Blessings to you and your sweet family,

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  18. I recently stumbled across your blog and was thrilled to see an update on Sylas. I read the old blog back from your pregnancy and when you had the babies.

    I can't begin to understand the emotion that you're feeling right now, but know that I am praying for you, as I have been ever since I heard about you. God's hands are holding you up and will continue to do so. I will continue to pray for you and your family.

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  19. Brianna, I don't feel like I have an inspiring comment to leave, but just wanted to say how much I love your family and your little guy, he is so full of Joy and is just adorable. It must be really tough at times, but you and Ryan are amazing parents. God will continue to give you grace and wisdom, and above all fill you with love for your kids!
    -Beka

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